Something happened to “Tin Soldier” on its way to release. The feature almost plays unfinished, but there are vague ideas in here about a doomsday cult and a rescue mission, while stars Scott Eastwood, Robert De Niro, and Jamie Foxx seem to be under the impression they’re appearing in a steely action movie. The whole film is a mess and tremendously difficult to sit through, but the endeavor is almost interesting to experience just as a picture that was likely conceived to be one thing completely fall apart in many different ways. “Tin Soldier” isn’t even a Bad Movie Night candidate, it’s just a shapeless blob of ideas, performances, and technical credits on the hunt for dramatic clarity that never arrives.
Comedian Amy Schumer made a positive impression in 2015’s “Trainwreck,” but things haven’t gone well for her screen presence over the last decade. “Kinda Pregnant” places Schumer and her sluggish, hackneyed sense of humor in the care of Adam Sandler’s Happy Madison Productions, and the Sandman brings his family to help make this abysmal comedy, including director Tyler Spindell (Sandler’s nephew), who hasn’t made even a passably decent movie since his career began in 2018. Schumer isn’t trying with the endeavor (she co-scripts the effort), sticking with lazy humor while tanking a promising premise, always going for the lamest ideas imaginable. “Kinda Pregnant” is profoundly unfunny and desperately formulaic, and holds the distinction of introducing the term “queef salad” to viewers who probably would rather not know such a word combination existed.
“Playdate” has the bright idea of pairing action star Alan Ritchson and comedy performer Kevin James for an offering of silliness involving two dads and their special day of bonding and battling bad guys. Director Luke Greenfield doesn’t provide any imagination with casting, and his sense of excitement is nonexistent. “Playdate” is a crude offering of PG-13 mayhem that may or may not be aimed at a family audience (it’s difficult to tell), but actual humor is definitely missing, forcing viewers to watch James and Ritchson attempt to make something enjoyable out of extensive greenscreen work and a wretched screenplay that treats structure like an afterthought. They certainly fail in their mission to turn this disaster into an even modestly enjoyable streaming distraction.
Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare
“Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare” was one of two 2025 entries in “The Twisted Childhood Universe,” with producers Rhys Frake-Waterfield and Scott Chambers hunting for a quick buck in the realm of public domain properties capable of being turned into horror movies. It’s the team responsible for “Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey,” and they definitely have a formula for these endeavors, once again returning viewers to the painfully low-budget world of grimy locations and routine gory events. Chambers directs, sticking with a plan to create something vicious out of a character typically associated with literary magic, and while the movie is incredibly violent, it’s also dreadfully paced and performed, battling iffy taste and clear filmmaking limitations. These endeavors are exploitation, but they’re also impossibly bad, with “Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare” sustaining the producers’ desire to put the least amount of effort into these offerings.
Writer/director Tyler Perry released three movies in 2025, and none of them worked. However, the worst of the bunch was “Madea’s Destination Wedding,” which brought everyone’s least favorite matriarch to The Bahamas, giving Perry and his cast and crew a free vacation, going the Adam Sandler route with a terrible comedy entirely dependent on Perry’s abilities to generate enough meandering nonsense to fill a sellable run time. The picture feels absolutely endless, representing some of the laziest moviemaking from Perry yet, who’s never met a scene he couldn’t grind into dust. The whole thing plays like a vacation video no one asked to see, especially with the teeth-rattling ways of Madea as its star.
Hollywood keeps attempting to make Pete Davidson a star, but he’s barely an actor. “The Home” provides the comedian with a chance to stretch a bit, selecting a more dramatic turn in a horror film from James De Monaco, who’s been busy over the last decade trying to keep his “Purge” franchise in play. Going the low budget route, DeMonaco strives to sell spookiness that never arrives, fumbling with clumsy filmmaking and story ideas too goofy to take seriously. And there’s Davidson, who looks lost trying to play it straight, not helping the cause with his wooden performance, bringing nothing to a clumsy endeavor that needs all the help it can find.
Writer/director Luc Besson hopes to get wild and sincere with “June and John,” looking to capture a whirlwind romance with help from smartphone cinematography. He ends up with a deeply unpleasant understanding of mental illness and criminal activity, sold with a sense of cutesiness that’s meant to charm viewers. It’s one bad idea after another in the feature, with Besson attempting to ride waves of impulsive behavior, keeping the feature visually loose, while the whole endeavor strives to deny a swelling atmosphere of sadness, generating some tonal whiplash along the way.
The lump of coal for the 2025 holiday season, “Oh. What. Fun.” was a sitcom-like offering from co-writer/director Michael Showalter, who pushed for slapstick and silliness without having anything truly funny to work with. Michelle Pfeiffer attempts to add some comedic emphasis to the endeavor, but she’s working uphill with abysmal writing that lifts ideas from numerous holiday classics in the name of “homage.” Showalter goes full autopilot here, laboring to emphasize Christmas feels to help cover for a DOA script.
Three “Strangers” movies were shot at the same time, intended to be released over the course of a single year. “The Strangers: Chapter 2” showed up in theaters 16 months after the release of “Chapter 1,” suggesting studio confidence was lost after audiences weren’t please with the first installment of a trilogy nobody asked for. “Chapter 2” weirdly didn’t advance the plot or increase (or introduce?) any suspense, with director Renny Harlin content to make an exceedingly dull and formulaic chase picture that was basically “Chapter 1” all over again. As horror entertainment goes, there’s nothing here that hasn’t been done before, and it’s all sold with such lethargy, including the set-up for the wholly unwelcome “Chapter 3.”
The curse of public domain returns with “Popeye’s Revenge,” which puts the famous sailor man in slasher film mode for this extremely cheapy production from director William Stead. It’s “Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey” all over again, with Stead attempting to use the gimmick of a beloved cartoon character doing horrible things to his victims to entice curious viewers to spend money on obvious schlock. There’s no fun factor in the picture, and little of the screenplay makes sense, making for an exceedingly long sit as Stead attempts to conjure camp and suspense with a tiny budget and feeble technical achievements. And this, dear reader, was one of two Monster Popeye endeavors, with “Popeye the Slayer Man” nearly identical in execution.
Also of note:
Mob Cops, Killing Mary Sue, Merv, Tyler Perry’s Duplicity, War of the Worlds, Hurry Up Tomorrow, I Heart Willie, Bride Hard, You’re Cordially Invited, Compulsion, I Know What You Did Last Summer, High Rollers, Tyler Perry’s Finding Joy, and A Working Man.
BRIAN ORNDORF 
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