Category: Film Review

“The ABCs of Death” is an unusual experiment in omnibus filmmaking, but
its uniqueness doesn’t wash away its persistent unpleasantness. Looking
to shock, tickle, and horrify its audience, the production bends over
backward to be the vilest movie of 2013, and it succeeds in many cases.
However, being unrepentantly ugly isn’t enough to support two hours of
twisted entertainment, and while there is a handful of highlights to
hold out hope that the feature may be coming to its senses, the majority
of the effort is either deathly dull, superhumanly moronic, or just
plain angry for reasons best communicated to a therapist. If “The ABCs
of Death” doesn’t put you to sleep, it’ll have you repeatedly lunging
for the fast-forward button. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

It’s been an extraordinary journey for director Michael Apted and his
longstanding “Up” series of documentaries. It’s a singular event that’s
managed to carry on for decades, arriving at its latest stop, “56 Up.”
We return to familiar faces and places with the new effort, catching up
with individuals who’ve been followed on film since 1964’s “Seven Up,”
and with this reintroduction comes an additional inspection of life in
motion, watching the participants come to terms with their families,
vocational and educational choices, and their very existence. Absorbing
as always, “56 Up” has the benefit of age, able to look back on these
personalities and gather a larger appreciation for their contributions
to this historic documentary odyssey. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

While teeming with questionable attitudes and taste issues, gaming
culture deserves a more respectful representation than what “Noobz” has
to offer. Built out of moldy stereotypes and crummy improvisations, the
comedy is painful to watch, with numerous opportunities for laughs and
satire flushed down the toilet so co-writer/director/star Blake Freeman
can parade around the most insipid material imaginable. The picture has
the premise and the atmosphere to at least inch toward a significant
razzing of video game particulars, yet Freeman seems almost afraid to
really dig into the personalities that clutch the controllers. Instead
of lighthearted adventuring, “Noobz” makes “The Wizard” look like “The
Matrix,” slogging through stupidity for what feels like an eternity at
times. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Imagining yourself as Indiana Jones in the thick of adventure wasn’t a
difficult task during the 1980s. He was a fixture of screen heroism and
pre-teen cool; a surrogate father for adolescent boys with bottomless
imaginations. However, what would happen if the adoration, that pure
impulse of cinematic love, turned into extensive homespun flattery? What
if three boys from Alabama, still tipsy from their “Raiders” theatrical
experience, decided to create their very own backyard version of the
Steven Spielberg gem, armed only with sky-high intentions, collective
allowances, and a Betamax camera? Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Franchises can be a funny thing, especially when there’s no room for the
story to grow organically, necessitating some fuzzy name brand math to
keep the cash rolling in. The absurdly titled “The Haunting in
Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia” has nothing to do with the 2009 hit
that starred Virginia Madsen, and not a frame of it takes place in
Connecticut. It’s a new story in an alien state, with the producers once
again taking shelter under dubious “true story” claims to concoct a
chiller of limited ambition, this time delving into the real-world pain
of slavery to locate a new conflict between the living and the dead. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

“War Witch” isn’t a message-minded film looking to expose the horrors of
the world in a coldly academic manner. It’s a character piece with a
loosely defined narrative, with an unusual sense of stillness to depict
matters of tremendous horror. Writer/director Kim Nguyen constructs a
harrowing portrait of innocence lost with minimal hysteria, finding a
richer sense of experience by restraining graphic violence and contrived
characterization. Infused with Terrence Malick spices, “War Witch” aims
for ambiance as a way to approach its searing images of war, keeping
the viewer unnerved instead of outraged when inspecting the troubles of
Africa. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

“So Undercover” represents star Miley Cyrus’s attempt to distance
herself from the tween entertainment she’s known for, without upsetting
her fanbase. It’s more adult in design, trying to toughen up the actress
with action and intrigue, while remaining attentive to the needs of
light comedy and romantic interests. It’s not an especially impressive
picture, but its hunt to find something new for Cyrus to do on-screen is
interesting, building a bridge between her cheery “Hannah Montana” work
and her thespian intentions for the future. “So Undercover” offers
Cyrus brandishing guns, dodging explosions, and engaging in terrible
improvisations. The little Disney star is all grown up, though Cyrus in
need of a script that’s as interested in maturity as she is. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Just when the zombie subgenre had seen enough of panicky survivors, the
stumbling undead, and doomsday landscapes of ruin, “Warm Bodies” swoops
in to save the day, or at least refreshes the concept long enough to get
excited about the prospect of watching brain-munchers on the big screen
again. Imaginatively directed and wonderfully performed, “Warm Bodies”
is a strange hybrid of zombies and Shakespeare, bringing a tilted
romantic comedy take on survival horror. The disorientation is bliss,
with the effort finding inventive ways to attack the routine, showing
amazing ability with a challenging tonal juggling act few filmmakers
could pull off. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

After his career crumbled in the early 2000s, Sylvester Stallone went on
the defensive, returning to characters and genres that provided his
biggest successes, using this safety net to engineer his own creative
path as a writer/director. The second wind resulted in “Rocky Balboa,”
“Rambo,” and “The Expendables,” three solid pictures of undeniable
popcorn appeal and unexpectedly potent atmospherics, restoring some
wattage to the star’s marquee value. “Bullet to the Head” (shot before
last summer’s “The Expendables 2”) is a return to Stallone’s
actor-for-hire bad habits. It’s an entertaining wad of macho
goofballery, no doubt, but without a tight grip of creative control and
the element of surprise, this actioner comes up short in lasting appeal. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

The teaming of Christopher Walken, Al Pacino, and Alan Arkin seems like a
can’t-miss proposition, offering the screen legends a premise that
allows for light comedy and heavy emotion, making the most out of this
rare moviemaking event. And yet “Stand Up Guys” is the opposite of
inspiring, wasting the talent on a dreary collection of random
adventures and unimaginative tomfoolery, hoping the sheer radiation of
ability is enough to fog the fact that the script never decides what it
really wants to be. Mostly baffling with a handful of bright moments,
“Stand Up Guys” is a bust that doesn’t know when to quit. In fact, it
doesn’t really know when to start either. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

With a documentary like “Sellebrity,” sympathy is in short supply.
Photographer Kevin Mazur, notable for his front-line access to famous
folks during red carpet events, endeavors to fashion a statement of
unease and outrage when it comes to the Wild West world of tabloid
photography, creating a portrait of anarchy to emphasize the divide
between self-promotion and exploitation. However, when dealing with
unshowered paparazzi types hunkered down on greasy street corners and
immaculate interviewees captured in their palatial homes, it’s a
lose-lose situation of sensitivity. “Sellebrity” is a numbing viewing
experience that’s oddly constructed and a touch too sanctimonious to
take seriously, eventually coming to blame the viewer for the ills of
the tabloid industry, despite Mazur feeding into the same diseased hype
with this cinematic effort. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Feminism meets exploitation in Austin Chick’s “Girls Against Boys,” a
particularly nasty revenge feature that attempts to explore a rattled
psychological space as it indulges in murders and a few grisly acts of
vengeance. It’s not particularly consistent or profound work from the
“XX/XY” filmmaker, but the effort has a certain style that holds
interest, scored to a throbbing range of soundtrack cuts that provide an
electronic pulse to otherwise banal events. Sure to divide audiences
with its fuzzy math and swing of the intellectual wiffle ball bat,
“Girls Against Boys” is best appreciated as a sensorial experience, with
the script successfully brushing against raw nerve endings of sympathy
and rage. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Now here’s a film with incredible promise, introducing itself as an
irreverent horror-comedy with profound interest in pantsing fairy tales
and splashing around in thick gobs of gore. “Hansel & Gretel: Witch
Hunters” aspires to be cheeky entertainment, sold with a wink and a fist
to the face (helping out its 3D presentation), with plenty of ghouls,
trolls, and horrible humans to populate a carnival atmosphere of genre
delights. However, despite a colorful presentation, the movie fails to
raise much hell, insisting on a flat tone of tedious storytelling when
all anyone really wants to see are the titular heroes continuously
slaughtering broom-riding she-devils, sprinting across this askew
fantasyland on the hunt to save humanity. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

I have no idea what the title “Movie 43” means, but I do know what the
picture is about. A series of sketches and commercials barely tied
together with a flimsy wraparound story, the collection is intended to
show off the zanier side of normally sedate talent, pushing
Oscar-winners and more dramatically inclined thespians into
taboo-smashing blasts of comedy, also making room for a few actors
specifically known for their crudeness a chance to join the party.
Stacked high with famous faces while the material is primarily
bottom-of-the-barrel muck unfit for feature-length investigation, “Movie
43” looks to enchant with a proud parade of shock value, asking ticket
buyers to delight in ugliness in the name of good fun. If this is “Movie
43,” I’d hate to see the previous 42 attempts at pronounced stupidity
the production didn’t want to release. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

“Parker” feels like a three-hour movie that was whittled down to two
hours due to test screening complaints. As a story, it’s all over the
place, whipping around last names and refusing any deeper inspection of
motivation. As a bruising offering of crime film entertainment, “Parker”
is more successful, staging compelling heists and mano-a-mano contests
of strength. The entire production fails to gel into a cohesive whole,
yet parts of the picture remain agreeably distracting, while stars Jason
Statham and Jennifer Lopez deliver what they’ve been paid for, adding
brawn and sex appeal when needed. It’s a messy effort with plot holes
galore, yet director Taylor Hackford manages to convince with the
essential elements. Just don’t think about the details too hard. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

Man vs. the elements is a common theme in moviemaking, allowing for an
appealing sense of ruggedness and oneness with nature that instantly
lends itself to movements of high adventure and the euphoria of personal
discovery. “Kon-Tiki” accepts the genre challenge with an incredible
story of survival and scientific craving to help power its cinematic
urgency, delivering genuine awe as it details the unwavering curiosity
of Thor Heyerdahl and his amazing trip from Peru to the Polynesian
Islands in 1947. Rich with character and heavy with ocean-based peril,
“Kon-Tiki” is unexpectedly exciting and refreshingly human, retaining a
searing sting of heartache and doubt as it manufactures eye-popping
moments of near-death experiences and the strange tranquility of total
isolation. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

The title “John Dies at the End” is a clever one, at least before the
film begins, promising a cheeky viewing experience with a boldly
spoilerific title that presents quite a challenge to the production,
tasked with keeping surprises when the very name of the effort gives
away the twist. It’s quickly established that “John Dies at the End”
isn’t going to be about a character named John, which is the first of
many disappointments contained within the movie. I suppose one isn’t
supposed take the picture so literally, but when the jokes are leaden,
the fantasy mangled by cut-rate visual effects, and the performances
rooted in sarcasm, there should be something here worth getting excited
about, even if it is just a mischievous title. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

“Knife Fight” often doesn’t know what type of film it wants to be.
Attempting to braid together political sincerity, political satire, and a
human element of guilt, the feature advances unevenly, stuck trying to
make sense of its erratic tone. While an ambitious effort to expose the
concentrated fraud of the campaigning process and all its collateral
damage, “Knife Fight” is a decent editor and a rewrite away from being a
passable statement of disgust. In its current form, the movie is a
mixed bag, offering a few winning performances and moments of
revelation, while the rest scatters aimlessly, in search of structure
director Bill Guttentag doesn’t provide. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

It’s important to take Guillermo del Toro’s executive producer credit
seriously, as “Mama” bears all the signs of his previous work. It’s a
ghost tale with an almost storybook atmosphere, despite its search for
forbidding areas of confrontation between the unaware and the undead.
It’s spooky and weird enough to work, with a knockout resolution that
maintains the story’s integrity — the cinematic equivalent of finding a
four-leaf clover. Sure, flaws are readily apparent and length is an
issue, but “Mama” is after a retro atmosphere of spookiness, trusting in
the art of unease. It’s skillfully made and manages to provide the
willies with only a few cheap shocks, making the movie something of an
anomaly in a genre that routinely amplifies its scares and pulls its
punches. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com

It might be hard to believe, but Arnold Schwarzenegger hasn’t starred in
a movie since 2003’s “Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.” Sure, there
have been cameos in two “Expendables” screen adventures and a weird part
in 2004’s “Around the World in 80 Days,” but the once mighty action
hero has laid low over the last decade, fighting different battles with a
special group of villains as Governor of California. “The Last Stand”
treats Schwarzenegger’s return as business as usual, dropping the star
into the thick of the hunt, with only a few jokes addressing his
advanced age before he’s back cracking skulls and blasting away goons.
Sure, the gags could be better, the casting stronger, and the thrills
continuous, but “The Last Stand” remains immensely enjoyable and
occasionally freewheeling. At the very least, it’s good to have
Schwarzenegger back on the screen where he belongs. Read the rest at Blu-ray.com